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Question Assalamoalaequm, In Islam is any sort of relationship allowed between the sexes before marriage? I was approached by an older cousin who loves me very much but marriage is impossible for the next few years due to my age and the circumstances. I did not think that a secret affair would be right so I have since turned him down. He claimed that to love is not a sin only under some rules and regulations given by Islam. Was I right in refusing him even though I liked him a lot? And is it haraam upon me to think about/remember him? Jazakallahkhair. Answer Bismillaah-ir-Rahmaan-ir-Raheem. Wa 'Alaykum-us-Salaam wa Rahmatullaahi wa Barakaatuh. 1) Islam does not permit any sort of relationship before marriage. Islam forbids fornication, and all actions that could lead to it eventually, and this begins by speaking and looking. This is the unique Islamic way of destroying evil from the root. 2) He claims to love you very much, but if you are not considering marriage, it would be best for you to let go of the idea. It is worth considering, that what the youth of today see as undying love, is many a time nothing more than infatuation and puppy love. True love is the mutual feeling that Allaah creates between man and woman through the Barakah of Nikaah. You are still young, and your outlook in life, and your likes and dislikes will vastly change over the next few years. At this stage, you cannot be sure that this is what you want for life. It would be best for you to forget about him, and ask him to forget about you. If you are written for each other, let it happen at the right time, and in the right manner. Do not force your destiny to unfold before its time. 3) Your refusal of pursuing a Haraam (illicit) relationship, was the right and Islamic thing to do, which most certainly earned you the pleasure of Allaah, inshaAllaah. 4) Thinking about a non-mahram (strange) man voluntarily, is a sin. However if these thoughts come involuntarily, banish them immediately, seek forgiveness and make the Zhikr of Allaah. If you entertain them you shall be sinful. And Allaah knows best. Wa Billaah-it-tawfiq. Wassalaam. A. Z. Pandor Taken from: Muftisays
When Desire Takes Over: Advice For College & University Students by Mawlana Abdus Subhan Dalvi 132 pages 3.09 MB Download here
Love & Unity By Shaykh-ul-Hadīth, Hadrat Mawlānā Muhammad Saleem Dhorat hafizahullāh Importance of Unity The strength of any group or nation lies in unity. If they unite, they will be capable of facing challenges with ease. Our beloved Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam has greatly emphasized unity and strove to unite the Ummah throughout his blessed life. Once during a journey, whilst Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam was in his tent, he heard the cries of two Sahābah radhiyallāhu ‘anhumā, one calling out to the Muhājirīn and the other to the Ansār; each one was looking for help against the other. Rasūlullāh sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam fearing disunity amongst the Sahābah radhiyallāhu ‘anhum, immediately got up and quickly reached the place of argument and said, “What is this call of the period of ignorance? Leave it aside, because it is filthy.” (Al-Bukhārī) During the period of ignorance, the people were divided on the basis of tribes, and they would support each other only on that basis; who was right and who was wrong did not matter to them. After the advent of Islām they had all become brothers through the Grace of Allāh ta‘ālā. Allāh ta‘ālā says: Love Leads to Unity For unity to come into existence, love is necessary. Where there is love there will be unity and where there is hatred there will be disunity. This is why Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam encouraged all those things that create love and discouraged everything that leads to animosity and hatred. A few examples are: Six Steps to Creating Love In order to create love between ourselves, we need to do the following: 1) Follow the whole Dīn of Allāh ta‘ālā. Allāh ta‘ālā says in the Glorious Qur’ān: Loving others and not having hatred for them is part of ‘good deeds’ too. So when people carry out good deeds, they will entertain love for people and as a result people will love them too. 2) Adorn ourselves with good character and from them a very important one is humbleness. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said: In order for a person to become elevated, others must have love and respect for him. Moreover, a person with humbleness will respect and love people and will surely be immune from hatred. 3) Help each other remaining within the boundaries of Dīn. Allāh ta‘ālā states: It is human nature that when someone confers a favour upon us, we experience a feeling of love and admiration for them in our hearts. 4) Become abstinent and do not desire what Allāh ta‘ālā has given to others. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said: 5) Exchange gifts. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said: 6) Spread salām. Nabī sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam said: Unity is something we must strive for at all levels, from our personal lives in terms of family and friends; on a local community level such as within our masājid, workplace etc; and on a national and international level with brothers and sisters throughout the world. Let us try our best to carry out the above mentioned six points and Allāh ta‘ālā will enlighten our hearts with love for each other inshā’allāh. Once this happens, unity will automatically follow. May Allāh ta‘ālā safeguard us all from disunity and everything that leads to disunity and grant us all the ability to inculcate love for one another so that we can remain united. Āmīn. © Riyādul Jannah (Vol. 27 No. 2, February 2018)
REKINDLE YOUR LOVE FOR RASULULLAH (SALLALLAHU ALAYHI WASALLAM) With the onset of Rabiul Awwal the hearts of the Believers are truly revitalised. Brimming with love and appreciation for our Beloved Prophet (salallahu alaihi wasalam) - connections are rekindled and deep reflections begin to take place. Our honourable Mufti Ebrahim Desai (Rahimahullah) would express great zeal and eagerness in propagating the beautiful message of our Beloved Rasulullah (salallahu alaihi wasalam) and was always so passionate about instilling the true love of Rasulullah( salallahu alaihi wasalam) in the hearts of the Believers. We will be sharing the recordings of the summarized discourses on the Qaseedah Burdah conducted by Mufti Sahib (Rahimahullah) throughout the month of Rabiul Awwal. We hope that these reminders will ignite within our hearts the true love of Rasulullah (Salallahu alaihi wasalam). We ask Allah to strengthen our Imaan through the barakah of these discourses and we make Dua it will be a means of Sadaqah Jariyah for our honourable Mufti Ebrahim Desai (Rahimahullah). DISCOURSE #1 | A SUMMARIZED VERSION OF THE QASEEDAH BURDAH BY MUFTI EBRAHIM DESAI (RAHIMAHULLAH) The discourse began with a beautiful recitation of some couplets from the Qaseedah Burdah by the Mu'adhin of Musjid Us Saliheen, Sheikh Yahya. The people really enjoy Sheikh Yahya’s rendition of the Qaseedah Burdah. Mufti Saheb began his discourse by mentioning the background of the composer of the Qaseedah Burdah, Allamah Busairi Rahmatullah Alayh. Allamah Busairi Rahmatullah Alayh hailed from Egypt. He was employed by the government. He associated with high profile people and had all the comforts and luxuries of Life. However, he did not have peace (Sukoon). On this, Mufti Saheb explained the difference between the means of peace and peace itself. He stated when one turns to Allalh, Allah will grant one peace. The various means of peace may not necessarily give one peace. Imam Busayri Rahmatullah Alayh identified a spiritual guide. This was a turning point. He then treaded the path of Tazkiyah. Allamah Busairi always wished to have the Ziyaarat of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam in his dream and wrote numerous poems in praises of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam. When he was old and afflicted with a stroke, Allamah Busairi Rahmatullah Alayh was blessed with the Ziyarah of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam in which he presented some couplets in the praises of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam.Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam was extremely pleased with this poetry and presented Allamah Busairi with a shawl. Hence, the name of the poem, poems of the Shawl. The love of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam is integral in the life of a believer. A person’s Imaan is not complete until the love of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam is more than the love of anyone else in your life. Mufti Saheb mentioned some incidents showing the love the Sahabah had for Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam and their acts of love which demonstrated their extreme love for Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam. Love has the potential to create a revolution in the life of a person. A person observes the beloved and wishes to emulate every action of the beloved. Mufti Saheb mentioned the story of Majnoon and Layla and the impact love can have in one's life. Mufti Saheb explained the introduction of the poems. There are two role players. One is an Ashiq (Lover) of Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam and the other is an observer of the Ashiq. The observer observes the reaction of the Ashiq-e-Rasool. Whenever there is a slight reference to Madinah Shareef, or the neighbourhood of Madinah Shareef, or even the mountains of Madinah Shareef, the Ashiq-e-Rasool gets emotional and his ‘eyes bleed tears’. That is an expression of a heart bleeding with love. Mufti Saheb then presented amazing incidents of the Sahabah’s love for Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam. LISTEN TO THE DISCOURSE HERE: https://darulmahmoodnet.files.wordpress.com/2020/11/mufti.ebrahim.desai_.saheb_.qaseedah.burdah.summarized.part1_.mp3