By Bint e Aisha
In Islam is any sort of relationship allowed between the sexes before marriage? I was approached by an older cousin who loves me very much but marriage is impossible for the next few years due to my age and the circumstances. I did not think that a secret affair would be right so I have since turned him down. He claimed that to love is not a sin only under some rules and regulations given by Islam. Was I right in refusing him even though I liked him a lot? And is it haraam upon me to think about/remember him? Jazakallahkhair.
Wa 'Alaykum-us-Salaam wa Rahmatullaahi wa Barakaatuh.
1) Islam does not permit any sort of relationship before marriage. Islam forbids fornication, and all actions that could lead to it eventually, and this begins by speaking and looking. This is the unique Islamic way of destroying evil from the root.
2) He claims to love you very much, but if you are not considering marriage, it would be best for you to let go of the idea. It is worth considering, that what the youth of today see as undying love, is many a time nothing more than infatuation and puppy love. True love is the mutual feeling that Allaah creates between man and woman through the Barakah of Nikaah. You are still young, and your outlook in life, and your likes and dislikes will vastly change over the next few years. At this stage, you cannot be sure that this is what you want for life. It would be best for you to forget about him, and ask him to forget about you. If you are written for each other, let it happen at the right time, and in the right manner. Do not force your destiny to unfold before its time.
3) Your refusal of pursuing a Haraam (illicit) relationship, was the right and Islamic thing to do, which most certainly earned you the pleasure of Allaah, inshaAllaah.
4) Thinking about a non-mahram (strange) man voluntarily, is a sin. However if these thoughts come involuntarily, banish them immediately, seek forgiveness and make the Zhikr of Allaah. If you entertain them you shall be sinful.
And Allaah knows best.
A. Z. Pandor
Taken from: Muftisays
When the Ummah is tested: Causes & Solutions
By: Mufti Muhammad Fārūq Meeruti (Rahimahullah) “Verily Allah does not change the condition of a people unless they change it themselves.” (Qur’an 13:11) The Muslim is daily faced by a host of new problems and difficulties. Their lives, property and self-respect is trampled upon and worse than that, their religious matters are tampered and interfered with, their Masjids are under constant threat and are disallowed proper implementation of their Islamic law. Our Blindness Despite this, the Muslim considers these to be chance occurrences or mere coincidences, thus never pausing to even consider the actual cause and reason behind this suffering. At the most, a few concerned souls, who are momentarily stirred by this state of affairs, call up some fancy conference, pass a few vague resolutions and disappear back into oblivion, contented that they have fulfilled their duties towards Islam. The Diagnosis A dire need exists for us to study the Qur’an and Hadith and thereby realize the primary cause for our disgrace and downfall. It is an undisputed axiom of reality that no incident occurs in this universe accidentally. Allah and His Messenger Sallallahu Alayhi wa Sallam have explained to us in the Qur’an and Hadith: “And whatever calamity befalls you, it is due to your own doings and Allah forgives many of your shortcomings.” (Qur’an 42:30) “Corruption has spread on water and land due to the doings of mankind in order that Allah make them taste the penalty of some of their doings. Perhaps they may retract (from their disobedience).” (Qur’an 30:41) Gratefulness Proper appreciation of Allah’s bounties is the correct utilization of these favours. To utilize life, health, faculties of sight, hearing, feeling, thinking, locomotion, finances, status and position, all for the pleasure of Allah and in accordance with His commandments is true appreciation of Allah’s bounties. The anti-thesis of this is ungratefulness, which invites the wrath and displeasure of Allah. Heavenly Blessings (Barakah) Adopting a life of Taqwa (piety) i.e. fulfilling all the commands of the Shariah and abstaining from the prohibitions is the cause of blessings descending from the heavens. “If the people of the locality had believed and adopted Taqwa (piety), We would have opened upon them the blessings of the heavens and the earth; but they denied and falsified, thus We seized them due to their actions.” (Qur’an, 7:96) The Consequences of Sin With regards to the verse, “And whatever calamity befalls you, it is due to your own doings.” (Qur’an 42:30), Rasulullah (Allah’s peace be upon him) explained the tafsīr of this verse to Hadrat Ali (may Allah’s be pleased with him) thus: “O Ali! whatever calamity befalls you: illness, affliction or any worldly calamity, it is the earning of your own hands.” Once Asmā bint Abi Bakr Radhiyallahu Anha experienced a headache. She exclaimed, “This is due to my sins.” (Durr al-Manthūr, Ibn Kathīr) Our Condition Let us now examine our lifestyles. Salaah, which has been described as the criterion between Imaan and Kufr (disbelief), how much does it feature in the life of the Muslims? How many adhere to the other basic requirements of Islam such as fasting, zakat, and hajj? On the other hand, consider the prohibitions of Islam, how many Muslims are engrossed in these day and night? How many have adopted these as part of their lifestyle? Liquor, Interest, Adultery, Bribery & Corruption, Disobedience to Parents, Enjoining Right and Forbidding Evil, Oppression and Injustice, Dishonouring the Ulama etc. are being perpetrated by Muslims on a daily basis. Our Example How cruel have we been upon ourselves that due to our sins we are constantly involving ourselves in disasters and calamities? At the same time, we continuously lament and wail away at our pathetic condition. Our example is like that of a person suffering from diarrhoea and yet continues to take laxatives, complaining all the time of diarrhoea. What could be said to such a fool? Oppressive Leaders In a similar way, today we complain about the oppression of our leaders, whereas these leaders have been appointed over us due to our transgressions. Rasulullah (Allah’s peace be upon him) said: Just as you (i.e. your actions) are, so will your rulers be. It is a popular adage: “Your actions are your rulers.” In other words, [based upon] your actions will your rulers treat you. This is the example of the Muslim Ummah. If we are disobedient to Allah, He appoints the weakest of nations upon us. They torture and oppress us most mercilessly. Our only salvation is by turning to Allah in sincere regret and repentance. Then no nation – not even the so called superpowers – will have the courage to stare at us! Time and again, we are crushed by disasters and calamities. Our laments, complaints, and wailing never end. Yet, when our shortcomings are pointed out to us, we remain totally indifferent and heedless. Never have we even attempted to bring about any reform within ourselves. Never have we attempted to avoid those destructive sins and crimes that are the direct sources of our misery and suffering. It is most astonishing that when an ordinary doctor warns of some epidemic, we are hasty to inoculate ourselves. Yet, when Allah and His Rasul (Allah’s peace be upon him) are consistently guiding us towards our success and warning us against our destruction (with the greatest of concern and sincerity) we remain totally unmoved and heedless, and we plunge headlong into those very pitfalls of destruction. Our only road to success and glory is total obedience to Allah and His Rasul (Allah’s peace be upon him) and following step-by-step the path tread by our pious predecessors.
By Bint e Aisha
When Desire Takes Over: Advice For College & University Students
by Mawlana Abdus Subhan Dalvi
Jerusalem and the solution from an Islamic perspective
The Muslims in Palestine are going through great trials. It is a duty upon us as an Ummah to find some solutions. There are many ways to assist and be of help but the most important is for us to turn to Allah sincerely and as a result, His help will come at the forefront. It is only who Allah can reverse difficult conditions in Palestine and all other war-torn countries. Unfortunately, we lack this greater realisation. We become very emotional in these times turning to social media to vent our anger and to partake in online protests. But the only way out from such difficulties lies in Qur’anic solutions and Prophetic guidance, not apps on our phones.
Nabi صلي الله عليه وسلم has instructed us that when a problem befalls the Ummah, engage in Qunoote Nazilah. This is a prayer performed after Fajr. Now my question is, where is the Ummah at Fajr? Many of us are sleeping it away, how then can we even pray Qunoote Nazilah together? Our assumptions are that a protest in the day is more effective and then we wonder why the mercy of Allah is not descending!
We can stand on the streets holding placards and banners, we can write letters after letters but if we continue to violate the laws of Allah, we will never be able to attract His mercy. Those who are involved in Tableegh are often criticised for wasting time speaking about the six points, rather than joining politics. Or those in Darul Ulooms are criticised for just teaching/studying, rather than taking a so called active role in assisting the Ummah.
We need to understand that these works of Deen are a means of strengthening our Imaan. They are teaching us deen and how we must take our gaze away from the creation and turn it towards Allah. Had we all collectively followed this golden advice, surely Allah’s help would have descended. Nabi صلي الله عليه وسلم mentioned to the effect that a person with disheveled hair, dust covered body and with raised hands cries out to Allah Taala, but where will his pleas be heard when his body is nourished with haraam. In other words, how can one who is engaged in major sins expect the help of Allah to descend?
Today as an Ummah we are exactly like this on a collective level. Sins have entered so stealthily in our lives, it can be difficult to even notice them. For example, many people do not take interest from the bank however, they accept their ebucks and loyalty points. This is from the bank’s pocket which is riddled with haram interest money. Therefore, it is not permissible for us to use, but do you see how easy it is to not notice and become involved in this haram? People pay for Umrah tickets with these rewards from the banks. Fine there may also be fatawa of permissibility regarding the rewards but in these matters, it is best to thread on the path of caution. Then there are those who take interest knowingly. Their cars, homes, even their businesses are running on it. Then we go on to wonder why Palestine is in the state that it is in and why our duas are not accepted?
Read the tasfseer of the Qur’an. Allah has made it clear that the first two holiest sites in Islam, Makkah Mukarramah and Madina Munawwarah, will always be protected by Him. Even the Dajjal will not be able to enter. However, the protection of third holiest site in Islam, Masjid Al-Aqsa, is dependent on the amaal (i.e. actions) of the Ummah. Thus if we ever need an insight into the condition of the Ummah at large, all we need to do is look at Aqsa. If it is peace and under the Muslim rule, know that the Imaan of this Ummah is at a good stand. If it is drowned in problems, know that we have a lot of work to do.
It is due to our sins that Aqsa is struggling today thus the solution lies with me, you and every individual in this Ummah. If we still think it lies in the United Nations office, then we still have not understood the basic lesson of the Kalima we read. That Allah does – with means, without means or against means. Everything happens by His will. All we need to do is to turn to Him. Once we all do that, He will shower his mercy by accepting our duas and this Ummah will return to the favourable condition it was once in.
May Allah save Aqsa and Juresalem from the unworthy hands, Aameen.
— Hazrat Ml. Dawood Seedat حفظه الله
The above is an article taken from www.islaahiadvices.com