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How to create harmony in a marriage


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How to create harmony in a marriage

Question

Is this narration authentic:

  عَنِ الثَّوْرِيِّ، عَنِ الْأَعْمَشِ، عَنْ أَبِي وَائِلٍ قَالَ: جَاءَ رَجُلٌ مِنْ بَجِيلَةَ إِلَى عَبْدِ اللَّهِ، فَقَالَ: إِنِّي قَدْ تَزَوَّجْتُ جَارِيَةً بِكْرًا، وَإِنِّي قَدْ خَشِيتُ أَنْ تَفْرِكَنِي، فَقَالَ عَبْدُ اللَّهِ: إِنَّ الْإِلْفَ مِنَ اللَّهِ، وَإِنَّ الْفَرْكَ مِنَ الشَّيْطَانِ، لِيُكَرِّهَ إِلَيْهِ مَا أَحَلَّ اللَّهُ لَهُ، فَإِذَا أُدْخِلَتْ عَلَيْكَ فَمُرْهَا فَلْتُصَلِّ خَلْفَكَ رَكْعَتَيْنِ، قَالَ الْأَعْمَشُ: فَذَكَرْتُهُ لِإِبْرَاهِيمَ، فَقَالَ: قَالَ عَبْدُ اللَّهِ: وَقُلِ: اللَّهُمَّ بَارِكْ لِي فِي أَهْلِي، وَبَارِكْ لَهُمْ فِيَّ، اللَّهُمَّ ارْزُقْنِي مِنْهُمْ، وَارْزُقْهُمْ مِنِّي، اللَّهُمَّ اجْمَعْ بَيْنَنَا مَا جَمَعْتَ إِلَى خَيْرٍ، وَفَرِّقْ بَيْنَنَا إِذَا فَرَّقْتَ إِلَى خَيْرٍ

Answer

Translation

Abu Wail (rahimahullah) narrates that a man came to ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud (radiyallahu’anhu) from Bajilah and said: ‘I am marrying a virgin girl, and I fear that she may dislike me, so ‘Abdullah mentioned: ‘Love is from Allah, and dislike is [caused] from Shaytan so he may make unattractive what Allah has made permissible for a person. When she enters, command her to perform two rak’ats behind you.’

A’mash (rahimahullah) said, I mentioned this to Ibrahim (Nakha’i), so he said,  ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud also said:

‘and say [in du’a after the salah]: O Allah grant me barakah in my family, and grant them barakah from me, O Allah grant me [sustenance, children etc] from them, and grant them the same from me, O Allah keep us together for as long as you do, with goodness, and when you separate us, let it be towards good [conditions that follow].’

 

Transliteration  of this du’a:

Allahumma barikli fi ahli, wa barik lahum fiyya. Allahummar zuqni minhum, war zuqhum minni. Allahummaj ma’ baynana ma jama’ta ila khayr, wa farriq baynana idha farraqta ila khayr.

 

Authenticity

This narration is recorded with several chains from Sayyiduna ‘Abdullah ibn Mas’ud (radiyallahu’anhu) and is classified as authentic.

(Musannaf ‘Abdur Razzaq, Hadith: 10460, 10461 and Al-Mu’jamul Kabir, Hadith: 8993.Also see Majma’uz zawaid, vol. 4 pg. 292)

 

Note: There is no harm in doing this even long into one’s marriage, and should not only be understood as a deed for the first meeting with one’s wife.

 

 

And Allah Ta’ala Knows best,

 

Answered by: Moulana Muhammad Abasoomar

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